Happy (derby) christmas!!!

So....very, VERY long time no post. Bad blogger *slaps wrist*. A helluva lot has happened since my last post, so I'll break it down in to bullet point format. I'm efficient like that.

1. The Tiger Bay Brawlers have their debut public bout on January 15th!! It's against Bristol, and needless to say I think the Brawlers will be pretty much wiping the floor with them. I am biased though...

2. The travel team squad for this bout was chosen at the start of December. I'm not on it. Kind of gutted, but in the weeks prior to selection I'd been so ill that I hadn't had much of a chance to skate. In my heart of hearts, I know I'm not ready just yet. It's not going to be long though - I plan to get my head down at training, work hard and earn my spot on the team. Before the year is out I would like to play in at least one travel team bout. Even if it takes me to the end of the year, that's what I'm working towards. Plus...the team that has been selected is a thing of beauty. Big hitters, fast jammers, smart players all round. I'm very proud to be part of such an amazing group of women.

3. I've passed my WFTDA minimum skills. Yes, the girl who would have a panic attack at the very thought of trying to skate on one foot HAS PASSED!

4. I've applied to be the 'Freshmeat Co-ordinator' of the league. I may not be the most amazing skater, but what I AM very good at is putting people at their ease. I'm a great people person (it's kind of an essential in nursing) and I enjoy nurturing others. I think I have it in me to bring out the best in people, and I love the thought of bringing out the best in our new skaters. These girls will form part of the future of our league, and I'd love to be a part of that.

5. The Brawlers have held two closed door bouts, team orange vs team black. My team, team black, won both times. Super proud!

So, with christmas almost over, what did derby santa bring you? I've had so much awesome stuff, up to and including some new American Apparel shorts and knee socks - I can never get enough of them! So, what did you get??

Derby love,

Trauma x

the little derby girl that could...

Firstly, pictures of two of my favorite Derby ladies:

The AMAZING Beyonslay

Kitty Decapitate showing us all how it's done

I've been doing some thinking recently about my progress in the weird and wonderful world of derby. I've had some real bad attacks of what has been called 'the meh' (as coined by LRG's Vigour Mortis in a post on the LRG forum) recently, and there are times when I've felt so downhearted I've wondered why I'm putting myself through all this.

My problem is simple: my problem is, well...me.

I'm not (and have never been) a 'sporty' person: the only sport I liked at school was rugby, and after 12 the girls weren't allowed to play. Hockey was only ever played in the dead of winter, and who wants to try and grip a hockey stick with freezing cold hands?! No, sports lessons were not something I ever really enjoyed. This was not helped that by age of 14 I had discovered cigarettes, and sports lessons then became just another chance to smoke. I don't even have the advantage of previous skating experience to help me: I had a pair of skates but I was utterly terrified to use them outside of my kitchen. Everything I have learned since April I have learned from scratch, from moving forward and stopping to crossovers and transitions. There are some lucky people (and many of them in my team) who take skating naturally: one or two goes and they've got a skill down, and proceed to fly past me as I stumble my way ungracefully around the track. It's so, so frustrating because skating just doesn't come easily to me: I have to work, work and work at it all the time. And I'm slow. Don't get me wrong, I've never been the fastest or most agile...but I've always been able to hold my own and end up somewhere around the middle. On skates however, no doubt about it, I'm S-L-O-W, and it really gets me down (well, it adds to 'the meh' anyway!).

It also makes me think, where is my place? I'm not and never will be a super-lithe jammer like Kitty Decapitate, I'm far too heavy and not anywhere near agile enough. Nor am I a powerhouse of a super-blocker, like Beyonslay, I'm too small. I come somewhere about the middle, and this leaves me wondering where my skill (if any) lies.

But you know what? In spite of all this, and in spite of the little voice in my head that tells me I'm not good enough, I WILL do this. If there is just one thing I've worked out it is that I'm in love with roller derby, even if it doesn't love me back just yet. But it will, in time.

...pump up the jam!

Since the last post I have moved house - yes, the blood, sweat and tears were worth it: I now have a lovley shiny new place to live which has a huuuuge garden with grass and trees and everything! Only downside? No internet connection as of yet. Which means I'm a bit behind on the ol' blogging. Ah well, I shall try and redeem myself today as I sit in the tranquility of Cathays library...



Last weekend BB went away to London to a jamming bootcamp and scrimmage with the London Roller Girls. The LRG are the UK's first and only WFTDA league in the UK, and they have earned this by playing other WFTDA leagues in the USA and generally working their collective asses off to become a super-league of awesomeness, to which we can all aspire. A few weeks ago Judge Redd, Jen Clawed Van Slamme, Peril Flynn and myself (yes, I want to try and start using our derby names!) ventured to London to watch an LRG bout called 'Smack to the Future', which featured the Steam Rollers taking on the mighty Suffra Jets. This was the first bout I had ever watched outside of the internet, and it made for some really interesting viewing. The sheer amount of work that had gone in to the event was staggering: everyone, and I mean EVERYONE in the league had a part to play, whether it was selling merch, marking the track, announcing, keeping score, timing the penalty box...well, you get the idea. From the rookies to the veterans, everyone pulled together. For example, Kamikaze Kitten: captain of the mighty all-star London Brawling (LRG's travel team) was on hand as a 'spills girl', wiping up any spilt drinks that might cause a hazard to the skaters.

Anyway, I digress. One thing that struck me as I watched the bout was that jammers DO NOT ALWAYS MAKE IT THROUGH THE PACK. In fact, there were several jams where the jammer got stuck behind some amazing blocking and couldn't make her first pass through the pack. And herein lies the lesson that BB started out with during Wednesday's training: you won't always make it through. Sometimes you will be stuck, jam after jam. It will be frustrating. You will be tired, sore, and annoyed. But you have to suck it up, get yourself together and get your ass back on the line to start again. Our first drill was a 'never ending jam', where we had about 10 blockers to 3 jammers. The blockers were allowed to booty block, but no contact. If the jammer couldn't make it through in the allotted time (2 minutes, just like a real jam), back they went on the line to do it again. And again. And again, until they got through. Oh crap, I thought. Jamming is not my strong point: I'm not agile and I lack confidence. The last few times I've jammed I've become trapped and not made it through. Needless the say, I was prepared to be jamming forever! As expected, on my first attempt I didn't get though. I was knocked out of bounds (and was given a whip by BB to get me back up to speed, thank you!) but just couldn't make it though before the 4 whistle blasts. So, back on the jammer line I went. But...instead of feeling sorry for myself, I was more determined than ever. At the sound of the jammer whistle, off I went. It took a little time, but I MADE IT THOUGH!! I was so proud of myself it was unreal. Yes, I know it's just a baby step on the great road of derby, but for me it was a great personal victory over my own self-doubt and fear. I can jam! Hurray!

The rest of the training session was utterly awesome - I don't know if maybe everyone had eaten their weetabix that morning or what, but everyone (and I mean everyone) had bought their A-game with them and really stepped it up. BB even put a lovely post on facebook saying how proud she was of us all. Our new ref Amy skated with us and helped to call penalties too, and she's getting good fast...it's so good to have her doing this as it's giving us a real understanding of how the rules work. I've read through the WFTDA rules and they boggled my mind, but using them during training is giving me a better idea of how they apply and when. I can't wait until we can start to scrimmage properly...I know it's a little while away yet, but now I'm getting more of a 'feel' for the game I'm hungry for more! Damn, this derby thing is addictive...

So, today is training day and we have our first 3 hour session...eeek! I'm pretty scared. After 2 hours I generally feel like my feet don't want to obey me any more and my thighs feel like they're on fire..I feel I may be crippled after this. Ah well, bring on the pain! I'm starting to feel more like a real rollergirl (and less like a pink-faced possum on wheels) every week.

Bring it on.

feeling hot hot hot!

Well, I think we can officially say that summer has begun! The weather has been heating up, my hay fever is kicking in and work has become truly hellish as the windows create a greenhouse effect that causes me to be pretty much soaked in sweat from about 10 minutes in to my shift.

Yesterday I had a hellish day in the inferno, followed by a night out for my friend's homecoming party (and I still have the fake blood on my legs!). I had a few drinks, but nothing major and I was home not long after midnight...so why oh why did I wake up today feeling like utter crap?!? Andy didn't fare much better, but neither of us could really pinpoint the source: we'd drunk, but not excessively and had lots of water too. Only difference was though that Andy didn't have to go to derby training at 4!

I was feeling rough right from the off: I managed to forget the first aid kit (again, jeez, what the hell is wrong with me?!?!) and as I laced my skates up I felt woozy and a bit sick. I warned BB that I wasn't feeling 100% so if I ended up sitting out not to be surprised! I got though the first hour ok...we did a whipping paceline which was fun, followed by an endurance drill that pretty much shredded my shins. So far so good. After a quick water break, we were back on the track for passive blocking drills (black vs white/coloured tops). At first I was ok, but after about 5 minutes I started to feel weird...like all the blood was draining out of my face. The room started to go a bit spinney so I took a knee and sat with my head between my legs trying not to pass out. Fettish thought maybe I was having a bit of a blood sugar dip so she got me a mars bar (thank you by the way!) and after that (and drinking loads of water) I felt a bit more human, but still shaky so I decided to sit out the rest of the second hour with Reeshi, who had bashed her head during the past drill. Watching the rest of our fellow Brawlers train was awesome, although pretty terrifying at times! BB was calling us for the many, many penalties being committed (there was tripping, grabbing, flailing, swimming to name a few) and for the last drill she created a mock up 'sin bin' that the girls had to sit in when called from the track - the time you serve for your penalty starts the second you hit the seat, so it's important to get to the sin bin as fast as you can, and you ALWAYS have to skate the outside of the track to get there. I have a funny feeling over the coming weeks I'm going to spending a fair bit of time in the bin until I can learn to control by bad habits...MUST.STOP.FLAILING!

So, just like last week I need more practice on my laterals, and generally build up my confidence a bit more. I've noticed recently that I feel miles behind so many of the other girls in my team. There are times during training I just want to cry, I get so frustrated with myself for not being to so something or for not doing it as well as the others. I know that practice makes perfect, and that I just need to keep plugging at it, but part of me worries that maybe this is it: this is as good as I can or will ever get. I've got some of the basics down, but there are so many things left to master...I look through the WFTDA minimum skills and feel like I'm very, very far away from passing it. Or even thinking about passing it.

Blah. I'm tired, over-heated and stressed out. A nice long bath and some sleep with give me perspective, and hopefully drag me away from the pity party I seem to have become stuck at.

just keep moving...

I'm right slap bang in the middle of a house move at the moment, so it feels like I do nothing but sort through masses of junk, dust and dead spiders (there have been LOTS of those, especially since I moved the chest of draws out...there was two years worth of junk under there!). Oh, and skate. I've been doing my level best to attend every session, even when tired...Kat is generally pretty good at giving me a motivational prod to get me moving, and I'm always glad afterwards.

Training sessions seem to be falling in to two categories for me at the moment: there are the ones where everything seems to 'click' and I feel like I'm making progress, and there are the ones where I seem to have two left skates and end up frustrated and annoyed with myself because it's like being back at square one again!

Sunday's training session fell in to the first category: during drills I felt confident and did some pretty good booty blocking/plough stopping during our waterfall drill (which I loved!) and even managed a pretty decent jamming speed (well, for me...we have some super-fast girls in the team and I'm nowhere near them, but it was progress for me!). I got some praise from BB, although she did chide me for grabbing (a recurring sin, I'm working on it though!). I felt so good at the end of that session, like things were finally falling in to place.

Then came Wednesday's session, which was definitely category two. It all started out well enough: warm-up laps with BB calling out different instructions on the whistle, eg one knee taps, plough stops ect ect. Fine, fine, so far so good. Then came transition stops. That's ok too, I can do those...when going slowly. But oh no, we had to do them AT SPEED! Eeeeeek! It's fair to say I wussed out pretty badly on these, I kept slowing down from my skating pace to turn, and that's no good because in the long run I need to be able to do these FAST. We moved on then to two packs, all of us numbered one to four. When BB called out our number we would have to do falls/stops in the pack. If we made contact with another pack member we had to do 5 push ups in the middle of the track...I ended up there 3 times! In a game situation failing to fall small and flailing is a minor, so it's best we learn good habits now! After my this we then did a 'hammer and nail' - basically we got in to groups of 3, 2 blockers and 1 jammer. The blockers would then whip off one another to booty block the jammer. All very fun, but because I'm still working on my lateral movements I felt like I just wasn't getting in the jammer's way enough and they would just nip round me. For our cool downs BB has been getting us to skate backwards...I can sort of manage it for about 3 seconds, then I lose all momentum. I feel like I don't know what to do with my weight: does it go back? Forwards? I'm still none the wiser. Reeshi saw I was struggling and gave me some helpful pointers, but then I got a little over confident...and that's when my big comedy fall happened. As usual, I hadn't bent my knees enough so when the slip happened, my wheels went out from under me, my legs flailed and *SMACK* down I went. I managed to hit my ass, my upper back and my head all in one go...nice one, Jo. I rolled over and scrambled up pretty fast, but it really shook me. My head was hurting and my back definitely wasn't happy about the sudden trip to the floor. Lesson here? BEND YOUR KNEES!! ALWAYS!!

So, my goals this week:
1. LATERALS, LATERALS LATERALS. I will conquer these!
2. Transition stops at speed, without plough stopping first
3. Pack awareness: keeping my hands to myself and skating closer to the rest of my pack.
4. WFTDA rule-learning.
5. Move house without my head exploding from the stress!

There is a silver lining to this moving malarky though: one I get my bond back I plan to treat myself to awesome skates, and since Kat A Clysmic has already broken her nylon plates I'm going to get aluminum ones. Here are the bad boys I have my beady eye on: http://www.bruisedboutique.com/onlinestore/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=103_112&products_id=339

In other news, we've pretty much sold out our fundraiser! This makes me very, very happy indeed. It looks to be an awesome night, so I will hopefully see some of you there!

Until next time...

catch up!

Again have neglected my blog. Bad Jo! But now I'm sat in bed on a day off with a cup of tea by my side (and my poor derby widow, who puts up with so much) I'm finally making the time to post.

Where to begin?

BB has been pushing us HARD in training...no longer are we just learning the basic skating skills, we're having to use them in game-like situations (although no actual scrimmage yet, we're just about to start running contact drills though. More about this later). We've learnt to passive block, which is also known as a booty block. The reason for this is that you're basically getting your ass in the opposing player's way, and at times you're pretty much sitting in their lap! This requires a lot of confidence, good lateral motions and being able to look behind you every 3 seconds to see where the jammer/opposing blocker is. In spite of having the kind of booty that this sort of thing was made for, I still lack confidence when blocking: my laterals aren't up to scratch yet (for some reason I can go right with no problems, but my feet don't like going left!) and my confidence is still a work in progress.

The other skill BB has had us working on is jamming. For those not in the know, the jammers are the point scorers in derby, and are marked out by having a star on their helmet covers. They score by passing the hip of each opposing player (who are trying to block them/knock them over!). To be a first class jammer you have to be lithe, agile and above all, FAST. Oh dear. I'm really not any of those things, and I know for a fact that I am one of the slowest skaters in my group. Every time I start to go fast I get the fear, and allow my momentum to slow me down. During a decent practice we ran a '4 wide' drill, which was a pace line where we were, well, four skaters wide. When BB blew the whistle the line at the back had to jam through the rest of the pace line and get to the front, and then the next line would go and so on. I think it's fair to say I absolutely, unequivocally SUCKED at this drill! For a start, every time I was my turn on the outside of my line (where you had to sprint) I would end up going to fast, losing control and ending up outside the track. I think my poor team spent more time looking for me than anything else, every time they turned around I had vanished! And then when it was time to jam...well, lets just say I didn't. Kat, Hayley and Leanne all attacked the situation with gusto, making it through to the front (or at last getting through the first few lines) while I got stuck behind the first line like an absolute lemon. I was too scared to take any opening I saw, and Donna, who was defending the inside line of the track, made sure I couldn't go anywhere! BB even took pity on me and tried to 'drill some holes' for me to pass through, but even then I was too scared and too slow to go anywhere. Honestly, the whole thing almost had me in tears and I started to wonder if I will ever be good enough. I told BB how disheartened I felt, and she gave me some sage advice - she feels what I need is confidence, and this takes time and practice. Apparently, my actual skating is ok...what's holding my back is my brain! This is just something that takes time and determination to overcome. On a more positive note, we ran another jamming drill in our last training session, and although I did cut track once and flail a little bit (grabbing an opposing player in the pack in the process, oops!) I MADE IT THOUGH THE PACK! Without getting stuck! This is a first for me, and has boosted my confidence no end.

So, there is still a long way to go...but I think I can make it. I'm going to set myself goals for each week, and work on getting them down. This week I am going to get lower (bend my knees!!) and go faster, and keep working on my laterals (mostly going left...). I let y'all know how I get on.

Until next time...

Time flies...

Long time, no update. Ooooops! But time does fly in the world of derby when you're having so much fun!

Where do I start?

Since my last update, we've acquired a new coach: Tui Lyon, aka BB Bombshell from the Victorian Roller Derby League in Oz. A statuesque amazon of a woman, she looks like she was born to play derby. She's over here in sunny (!) Wales with her man for a few months, and has been kind enough to come and help whip our fresh meat asses in to shape. And by gods, she is GOOD. Watching her you'd find it hard to believe she wasn't born with a pair of skates attached to her feet: it looks so effortless and natural! However, she has assured us that there was a time when she was a wobbly learner and fell over all the time. It's so heartening - I look at her and think with enough time and practice, what will be me someday.

On to the training...

We had one last session on the swamp that is Fitzalan high, and Sian took the opportunity to introduce us to pylometric exercises. Oh my, the PAAAAIN! They involve lots of squats, jumps and other moves to help develop strength and muscle tone in vital areas (thighs, ass etc). I had gone to the session straight from work so I was already pretty tired...by the end of the session my legs felt pretty much dead. The next day I struggled to walk! I wasn't the only one though, which is good. The more I skate, the more I will develop these muscles and the better I will skate. My theory, anyway.

During our sessions on Channel View (and it's ice rink floor of death) BB has been teaching us the derby skills we will need to pass our minimum skills: crossovers, derby stance, laterals, etc. I'm noticing improvement in my skating every week - things I was too scared to even try a few weeks ago I'm starting to get down. I'm not afraid to push myself, and every time I fall (and I do!) I get back up and keep going. There are a few things that are still eluding me though: crossovers, plough stops and laterals. And I know that I just DON'T BEND MY KNEES ENOUGH. That is my worst derby crime and the reason that the last couple of times I've wiped out I've ended up on my hip/ass and not on my knees. It's something I really need to keep working on. My crossovers are coming on though - yesterday I managed one or two around the corners without getting the fear. I know it'll come with time and practice. There are some things I am good at though...my T-stops are pretty good and I can transition (go from front to back) quite well. Kat and I have been working on my transition stops in our dining room and we seem to be getting it down. It helps so much to have someone watch what you're doing and give you feedback - in my case, it mostly consists of 'BEND YOUR KNEES!'. It's the key to so many things in derby...

Finally, on to kit - BB gave us a really useful talk on skates, wheels and pads. I had a bit of a windfall last week (well, money back from my ex) so I invested in a pair of Smiths Scabs knee pads. I'd noticed my knees were really, really hurting after doing falls in my anarchy pads and did a bit of research (and posting on forums) I decided to upgrade. They seem to work very well for me - I'm pretty tall and they're quite long line. They're taking a bit of getting used to for crossovers though as they're so bulky compared to my old pads...it means having to lift my leg over further, which is scary! Hopefully this will just teach me to do deeper crossovers and make me a better skater in the long run.

I also have my new skates! Sure Grip Rebels with Fugitive wheels ^_^ I love them, although they took a bit of getting used to after so long in my Rios. I've decided to get some new wheels soon - channel view is so slippy I'm going to get some grippier ones. Sure Grip Sugars seem to be the best choice, and if the new floor we're going to be skating on in Coleg Glan Hafran is better I can mix them with my fugitives and have them as pushers.

So, until next time derby fans...over and out.